family, parenting, mental health, wellness

When Your Loved One Needs Help: Recognizing Mental Health Issues in Kids and Spouses

March 13, 20257 min read

Recognizing Mental Health Challenges in Your Family: A Parent's Guide to Wellness and Fulfillment

As parents, we often find ourselves juggling countless responsibilities, from managing household tasks to nurturing our children's growth. In this whirlwind of family life, it's easy to overlook the subtle signs that someone we love might be struggling with their mental health. Today, we're diving into the crucial topic of recognizing mental health challenges within our families and how to navigate these waters while maintaining our own sense of fulfillment and well-being.

The Importance of Mental Health Awareness in Families

Let's face it: parenting is no walk in the park. We're constantly striving to create a nurturing environment for our children while also trying to keep our own heads above water. It's in this delicate balance that mental health issues can sometimes slip under the radar. But recognizing these challenges early on can make all the difference in our family's overall happiness and functionality.

As Marsha M. Linehan, creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, so poignantly puts it:

"People with BPD are like people with third-degree burns over 90% of their bodies. Lacking emotional skin, they feel agony at the slightest touch or movement."

This vivid analogy reminds us of the intense emotional experiences that those with mental health challenges, such as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), face daily. It's a stark reminder of why awareness and understanding are so crucial in our family dynamics.

Common Mental Health Challenges in Families

Let's explore some of the mental health issues that might be affecting your loved ones:

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

BPD is characterized by intense and unstable emotions, fear of abandonment, and tumultuous relationships. People with BPD often experience:

  • Intense mood swings

  • Impulsive behaviors

  • Chronic feelings of emptiness

  • Difficulty maintaining stable relationships

As parents, we might notice our spouse or teenager exhibiting these symptoms, making family life feel like an emotional rollercoaster.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)

NPD involves an inflated sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. Signs include:

  • Grandiose sense of self-importance

  • Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success or power

  • Belief that they are special and unique

  • Need for constant admiration

Living with someone who has NPD can be challenging, as their needs often overshadow those of other family members.

Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder involves extreme mood swings between manic highs and depressive lows. During manic episodes, a person might:

  • Feel abnormally upbeat and energetic

  • Have decreased need for sleep

  • Engage in risky behaviors

During depressive episodes, they might:

  • Feel sad, empty, or hopeless

  • Lose interest in activities they once enjoyed

  • Experience significant changes in appetite or sleep patterns

Hilary Moses, LCSW, offers an insightful perspective on the intensity of these experiences:

"What we experience as a 3 on the difficulty scale of 1-10, they likely experience as an 11. They might be smart and capable, which leads loved ones scratching their heads when something seemingly simple knocks them down."

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Recognizing the Signs: When to Seek Help

As parents striving for fulfillment and balance, it's crucial to know when it's time to seek professional help for our loved ones or ourselves. Here are some key indicators:

  1. Persistent behavioral changes lasting months or years

  2. Significant impact on work, school, or relationships

  3. Difficulty changing behavior despite negative consequences

  4. Lack of awareness about how actions affect others

Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a step towards creating a healthier, more fulfilling family life.

Navigating Mental Health Challenges While Prioritizing Self-Care

It's a common parental instinct to put our children's needs before our own. However, when dealing with mental health challenges in the family, it's crucial to maintain our own well-being. Here's how you can strike that balance:

Set Clear Boundaries

Establish and communicate your limits clearly. It's okay to say no when you need to recharge or focus on your own needs.

Build a Support Network

Surround yourself with understanding friends, family members, or support groups. Having a safe space to share your experiences can be incredibly therapeutic.

Practice Self-Care Regularly

Make time for activities that rejuvenate you, whether it's reading a book, going for a walk, or practicing meditation. Remember, self-care isn't selfish; it's necessary.

Seek Professional Help for Yourself

Don't hesitate to consult a therapist or counselor for your own mental health. They can provide valuable tools to help you navigate family challenges while maintaining your own well-being.

Modeling Healthy Behaviors for Our Children

As parents, we have the unique opportunity to model healthy coping mechanisms and self-care practices for our children. By prioritizing our own mental health and well-being, we're teaching our kids valuable life skills.

Stephanie Capecchi, LCSW, offers an encouraging perspective on dealing with mental health diagnoses:

"A Borderline Personality Disorder diagnosis can certainly make someone uneasy, but with the right treatment and compassionate understanding, it's treatable and does not need to be something to fear."

This applies not just to BPD, but to all mental health challenges. By approaching these issues with compassion and a willingness to seek help, we're showing our children that it's okay to struggle and that there's strength in seeking support.

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Nurturing Your Gifts and Talents Alongside Your Kids

While managing family mental health challenges, it's easy to lose sight of our own passions and aspirations. However, pursuing our interests isn't just beneficial for us; it sets a powerful example for our children. Here are some ways to nurture your talents while involving your family:

  1. Share your hobbies with your kids, turning them into bonding experiences

  2. Set aside dedicated time for your personal projects, and explain to your children why this time is important

  3. Celebrate your achievements, big and small, with your family

  4. Encourage your children to explore their own interests, fostering a household culture of lifelong learning and growth

Creating a Fulfilling Family Life Amidst Challenges

Dealing with mental health issues in the family doesn't mean you can't lead a fulfilling life. In fact, these challenges can often lead to deeper connections and personal growth. Here are some strategies to foster fulfillment:

Open Communication

Create a safe space for family members to express their feelings and concerns. Regular family meetings or check-ins can be helpful.

Celebrate Small Victories

Acknowledge and celebrate the small steps towards better mental health and family harmony. This could be as simple as a calm family dinner or a productive therapy session.

Practice Gratitude

Encourage each family member to share one thing they're grateful for each day. This practice can shift focus towards positivity, even during challenging times.

Plan Fun Family Activities

Make time for enjoyable family outings or activities. These shared experiences can strengthen bonds and create positive memories.

Embrace Imperfection

Remember that no family is perfect, and it's okay to have bad days. What matters is how you come together and support each other through the ups and downs.

Conclusion: Embracing the Journey Towards Family Wellness

Navigating mental health challenges within our families is no small feat. It requires patience, understanding, and a commitment to both personal and collective growth. As parents, we have the power to create an environment where mental health is prioritized, discussed openly, and treated with compassion.

Remember, taking care of your own mental health and pursuing your passions isn't selfish – it's essential. By modeling self-care, healthy boundaries, and the pursuit of personal fulfillment, we're giving our children invaluable life lessons.

As we strive for balance and wellness in our families, let's embrace the words of the renowned family therapist Virginia Satir:

"Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family."

By recognizing and addressing mental health challenges, prioritizing our own well-being, and fostering an environment of open communication and acceptance, we can create that nurturing family atmosphere. In doing so, we're not just managing day-to-day challenges – we're building a foundation for lifelong family wellness and personal fulfillment.

Remember, the journey towards family mental health and personal fulfillment is ongoing. There will be ups and downs, but with awareness, compassion, and the right support, you can navigate this path successfully. You're not just parenting; you're creating a legacy of mental wellness and fulfillment that will benefit generations to come.


Join us on Fulfillment Therapy, where you'll find healing, wellness, and the tools needed to live a life you can't wait to wake up to. Together, we can create positive ripples of change and help others ignite their lives with lasting joy and fulfillment.

Thanks for reading and listening and shine boldly and brightly, my friends!


*Listen to our podcast episode 199 | When Your Loved One Needs Help: Recognizing Mental Health Issues in Kids and Spouses


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